Here, take an English lady zipping about in heels, annihilating monsters to a delectable soundtrack.
Rest at this camp to refill your potions, and better brush up on those parrying and dodging skills!
You like God of War?
How about a dozen different finishers that would make Kratos blush.
Melee combat not for you?
Exactly how you want to devastate each poor Naytiba you cross is up to you from here.
Or the Skulling, which attaches itself to a new body if you don’t kill it quickly enough.
At times, this can venture into being a little too easy.
And starting a fight with multiple baddies is usually a recipe for instant death.
But once that Beta energy is charged back up, it’s bye-bye Naytiba.
Late-game battles aside, it’s a very easy way to just nope out of harder encounters.
It’s nice to actually feel like the killing machine all the cutscenes make Eve out to be.
The only issue is that hard mode doesn’t unlock until you’ve completed the main story.
Music during boss battles is also a treat, injecting some intensity, even if the difficulty doesn’t.
Rinse and repeat, song after song, and oh dear, is it 2am again?
Stellar Blade lives off a vibe.
No thinking, just slashing.
It’s yet another example of riffing on those that have come before without adding much of its own.
Invisible walls, questionable voice acting, platforming quirks - and oh boy, those quirks.
Sometimes Eve auto-grabs a ledge, sometimes she doesn’t.
The swinging ropeneverlines up to a smooth leap.
Back in their day, you see, their polygons weresexy.
There was none of this diverse range of faces and body types that they decree looks ugly.
Look, I don’t completely believe that Eve was designed solely to cater for men.
It comes across as sleazy, yes, but apparently that works for more than just men.
In one sense, it makes me think who am I to judge, really?
I sleep with birdmen inMass Effect.
It’s an unwelcome reminder of how gaming used to treat its women as objects to ogle.
Stellar Blade accessibility options
Colourblind presets and filter intensity.
QTE auto success toggle.
Motion blur and camera shake sliders.
Subtitle size and background adjustments.
HUD size adjustment and background option.
Hint and tutorial systems.
Camera and aiming sensitivity sliders.
Can turn off adaptive triggers.
Auto lock-on when attacking.
Of course the gamers are debating boobs, what else would they be doing?
Or if everybody else found the extremely odd dialogue just as funny.
How about that extravaganza of boss fights near the end?
A copy of Stellar Blade was provided for review by Sony Interactive Entertainment.
